Mgccl's Ivory Towerso tired

Calculus are for engineering(especially physics related) students. I thought a Math/CS majors like me would never use calculus after the completion of the calculus sequence. I don't intend to learn calculus to the point that I can do integrals like my second nature.

Then today I was doing AMS 311's HW 5. It requires immense calculus power. I wasn't aware of how much calculus was required for this course. Now it replaced CSE 541 as the hardest course ever.(CSE 541's midterm is pretty ez, in fact, I feel CSE 541 is really really ez now... as long as I understand the tower of definition and really long proofs)

I should have seen it coming, it's a AMS classes that have to work with continuous functions. AMS don't use analysis to prove thing, they calculate stuff. Calculus is RIGHT THERE.

This is not the first time I noticed how I suck at calculus.

I never got calculus. so what if I got 9 in math placement because of the AP test. If I go and take a MAT 131 final right now I would surely fail.

This lack of calculus skill have struck me at least 3 times since I'm in the university.

1. While doing MAT 305, I found it's impossible to do some integrals without a table of integral around me. I also have to look up integration by parts.
2. People around me who are in calc 1 or calc 2 would ask me calc problems. and I can't answer them without help of mathematica. In fact, why ask me when one can use Wolfram Alpha? I can't provide any more insight than rephrase the question in a way a computer would understand.
3. During Putnam, I skipped any problem has differentiation or integration.

I remember I was having breakfast last semester, and someone gave me this simple limit problem, and I can't solve it even when I have finished breakfast. What a disappointment, people believed I can do MAT 131 level problems because I was in more advanced math courses. No, I just do different kind of math.

I'm sure I can improve my calculus problem solving technique to among the best by finish Demidovich's book of around 5000 calculus problems. I see no point in that though, since AMS 311 might be the last time I will ever really do calculus.

I was bored on facebook, so I made a few sup dawg math jokes. Then I go on and did a lot more. Sure it's lame and most are non-creative.

sup dawg, I heard you like sets, so I put a set in your set so you can union while you union!

sup dawg, I heard you like block matrix, so I put a block matrix inside your block matrix so you can multiply while you multiply!

sup dawg, I heard you like induction, so I put a parameter in a parameter so you can induct while you induct!

sup dawg, I heard you like recursion, so I put a function inside itself so you can recurse while you recurse while you recurse while you recurse while you....

or
sup dawg, I heard you like recursion, so I put a sup dawg inside your sup dawg, so you can sup dawg, I heard you like recursion, so I put a sup dawg inside your sup dawg, so you can....

sup dawg, I heard you like expanding, so I put a binomial coefficient inside your binomial coefficient so you can expand while you expand!

sup dawg, I heard you like trigonometry, so I put a arcsin inside your sin so you can do trig while maintain your identity.

sup dawg, I heard you like boring calculations, so I put a differential equations inside your differential equation so you can calculate while you calculate.

sup dawg, I heard you like Hilbert's program, so I put a formal system inside your formal system so you can be incomplete while incomplete!

sup dawg, I heard you like linear algebra done right, so I put a... nvm, you don't learn determinants.

sup dawg, I heard you like probability, so I put some probability in your probability so you can expect while you expect!

sup dawg, I heard you like binary trees, so I put a binary tree in your binary tree so you can search while you search.

sup dawg, I heard you like graphs, so I put a graph inside your graph so you can transverse while transverse.

sup dawg, I heard you like expensive textbooks, so I put Sipser's book inside Applied Combinatorics, so you can cry while you cry.

A joke I heard today, so I translated it. Note the teacher can punish students by not allow them to sit down. Discipline!

The math teacher asks Lei.
"How many people are there in your group?"
"12"
"How many ways can you line up your group if you are not allowed to be in the first or the last place."
"hmmm..." Lei thought for a long time and can't give an answer.
"You are not allowed to sit down until class ends."
Then teacher asks Wei.
"How many people are there in your group?"
"3"
......
Everyone laughs on in inside for Wei's epic win.
The teacher thought for a while, and asked.
"Suppose each member in your group have to pick a few people from Lei's group to form 3 new groups. How many ways are there?"

PWNT!

A: matrix A and B are n * n matrices
A: AB = A +B
A: prove AB = BA
B: lets seee
B: well
B: hmm
B: A(B-1) = B
B: B(A-1) = A
B: B(A-1)(B-1) = B
B: so B could be the null matrix implying so is A and obviously AB = BA
B: else
B: (A-1)(B-1) = I
B: AB - B - A + 1 = I
B: AB + 1 = I + A + B
B: 1 = I
B: which obviously isnt true
B: so only solution is A = B = null matrix?
B: my linear algebra sucks so its possible i made some stupid mistakes in there
B: yeah i must have made some mistakes
B: xDDDDD
A: lol
A: 1 = I
A: you should be consistant with your notation
B: i dont see where im inconsistant!
A: O.o
B: and thats why i said i probably screwed up
A: I is the identity matrix right?
B: yeah
A: then what is 1? identity matrix?
B: probably just a constant

Later

A: When I go back to China.
A: I'm going to go to the bookstores
A: and stay in "Olympiad math/informatics/physics/w/e section"
A: and when I see a cute girl who is looking over olympiad math and informatic books
A: I pick her up :)
B: ohh i see
B: and how will you do that?
A: with my superior math skillz of course!
B: what if shes better than you?!
B: trick question girls cant do math
A: then I will move to the "middle school Olympiad math/informatics/physics/w/e section" instead
B: its a good plan
A: - -
A: it's a joke obviously...
A: I prefer math grad students.
B: lol

What's with those people saying math is not a spectator sport. They are so WRONG.

I just imagined this epic math performance.

"This is John Doe here reporting on the newest development in Spectacular Math Competition. We are currently live and over 1 million viewers world wide is watching it with us. Z is currently working on the last problem. He wrote down a few lines of proofs. He crossed them out! He looks like he is thinking. Now on the other side, X is drawing a diagram, looks like a figure with four vertices. Could it be... a square?... oh no, it's a rectangle! Z just looked up, has he thought of some elegant proof? No, just someone flashing in the audience. X seems to give up. He put his head down. Y is the only contestant who wrote down nothing on his paper. From previous competitions, we found Y does all the proof in his head, if he ever write something, that's when he have the full solution... oh my god, look, Y just picked up the pen! The crowd is chanting his name. Cheerleaders' from Y's high school spell out the Euler formula. That's a new one, last time it was the sum of squares formula. Z seems to have figured out something too, he shouts "Eureka!" and start to write on his paper with his pencil blessed by the Pope. The competition ends in 10 minutes, could they finish the proof...oh, nvm that, Y raised his hand! A staff is walking toward him. The staff now has Y's paper and walking toward the judges. The judges have the paper. They are making photocopies. Z's pencil broke! He found another pencil, oh that's the pencil once held by Obama! Ahh, always remember to bring more than one pencil to competitions. Now each judge is reading Y's paper. One judge shakes his head and circled something. Another judge is looking over, it seems they got into some argument. Ok, the argument seems to be resolved... and..."

I give up. Mathematics is not a spectator sport.